Whirlwind

This has been a good week so far, despite the plague, and the usual scurrying and fetching. Or maybe it's just that the Prozac's working.

Either way.

It's also been productive.

I met with the school guidance counselor yesterday to discuss my daughter's class selections for middle school next year. I pushed hard for her to be assigned to a more rigorous academic path; (largely because I want her to be surrounded by a higher caliber of classmates, and I am not ashamed to admit it.)

I am sure that any day now I will also be called to do the same for my son, who enters high school (gulp) next fall.

So far this week I have: cleaned the van out. Worked 20 hours. Took myself and my son to the eye doctor's, got haircuts for all three kids, got new jeans and shoes for the kids, and grocery shopped. I have made a couple of great meals, and watched a cute movie while snuggling with an even cuter boy. Tonight I took the kids to PTA night at McDonald's (ugh) then came home, cleaned the bathrooms, filled out field trip forms, did four loads of laundry, two loads of dishes, vacuumed, helped with homework, and read two chapters of my new Dan Brown book.

AND.....it's only Tuesday.

Bitch bitch whine whine

I seem to be dying faster than usual today.

A few weeks ago I had this sinus thing, and finally broke down and took antibiotics for it. I never quite felt great afterwards but, you know, it's been really cold, and I have been super busy, and so on and so forth. I never paid it a lot of attention; except I've been passing out cold at like 8pm for weeks and dragging ass all the time, which was annoying.

Add to the the day last week when I scraped my top gums pretty bad in a klutzy tooth-brushing while multi-tasking incident, which got all gnarly and ulcerated; and my contacts bugging me so I had been wearing my glasses, which are ten years old; and you can sort of see where the fact that my face was throbbing and I was having headaches all day, every day was easy to pass off as something else.

Today, though, was the inauguration of some symptoms even I cannot ignore. This morning my throat was raw, then I tried to draw a deep breath and it felt like my ribs were on fire, followed by a deep and wracking cough, and, oh...hey, is that a FEVER?

2010, I gotta tell you, so far I am Not Impressed.

Still I managed to get to work, and not face-plant at my desk, and my Dr. called in the nuclear offensive of antibiotics for me. In a feverish haze, I hit the drive-thru pharmacy, then stumbled home, and somehow managed to make an actual nutritious dinner for the kids.

I am resisting unconsciousness only long enough to make sure my little winners shower and make it into their own beds. Zythromycin, Mucinex, Ibuprofen, Claritin D and Ativan are waiting on my bedside table to lull me into a pharmaceutical coma and I damn well better wake up feeling amazing.

Or at least not hacking up blood....I'll take what I can get at this point.

True Grit

Tonight I went grocery shopping, because, well...the kids just seem to want to EAT, like, all the time. Which is really irritating in and of itself, but it also means I have to shop, drag shit home and put it all away. After work, too. (I'll try to contain my enthusiasm for that little excursion, we have all been there, done that.)

So, in a fit of idiocy, I bought a 5lb sack of grits. Not the smaller container in the sturdy, oatmeal-style cardboard cannister, no, I bought the giant-sized economy bag. Why not, right? Hell I love me some grits, and anyway I was out. Where I live, grits are even considered a vegetable, they're CORN, aren't they? They practically burn you at the stake here in the Deep South if you don't eat your weight in grits a year. Not that I am complaining, heavens no. I mean, YUM, grits, cheesy, garlicky, buttery, with bacon, next to eggs, topped with shrimp...grits are fabulous, am I right?

Except when you accidentally somehow rip a hole in your stupid, giant, jumbo sack of grits and pour them out like sand all over your floor, not paying attention, and them have to spend hours sweeping and vacuuming your kitchen floor because grits are so, well....gritty.

Well anyway.

Back to real life today, and it sucked as hard as I thought it would not to wake up next to my sweetie, alone in the vast, chilly expanse of this beautiful four poster king sized bed. Grimacing at the hour, and making coffee and shuttling the kids, out, out, it's time to go....onto the bus before dawn, then scurrying into the shower and out the door myself, the work phone ringing as I pull out of the driveway...monday.

The day was long and full of assholes.

And at the end of it I came home and made tacos, and brownies. My kids are completely giddy and full of themselves and everyone's getting along and in good, if high, spirits.

My feet are cold, and I need a hug, and I haven't taken down the Christmas tree, or done the dinner dishes. But the brownies are fucking delectable, my kids are happy, and so. So.

Dear VCB

Love.

Always.

But you already knew that.

Here's to a Happier New Year.

2009. Wow. The most tumultuous year of my life without a doubt.

The Good:

I lost 180 pounds of ex husband when my divorce was finalized this summer

Went back to my maiden name

Kept my restraining order through 2011

The kids are doing great- they all made the honor roll, and are adjusting fabulously

Sold (finally!) the former marital home

Paid off my attorney's outrageously large bill (note to any woman getting divorced- use the best lawyer you can find right from day one. Listen carefully to his advice and follow it to the letter. Yes it will be Very Expensive. It will also be Well Worth It, especially if you have kids and/or an abusive or criminal ex-to-be.)

Like my new job

LOVE the new house

We had a really wonderful Christmas.

And there were no really unforeseen catastrophes, everyone's healthy, all cylinders are firing.

The Bad:

Well, the worst, maybe, loss of my life so far was this year. So that sucked. My beloved Grandfather passed away September 1, 2009. I miss him terribly, every single day. I haven't been the same without him. I don't know that I will ever be.

Some other things that suck:

I spent a lot of time in court. I won, pretty much every time, but still. Ugh. Court.

Made virtually no money on the sale of my house after the lawyer bill was paid

Jackass is still delighting in screwing with the kids, child support, and visitation at every opportunity

The VCB and I are still living in two separate houses

All in all 2009 got me a lot closer to where I want to be though...so while it was a long and messy road it proved to be a very productive journey. And isn't that all we can really hope for?

Here's to 2010. May it bring you all the desires of your heart.